So You Think You Can Win My Vote By Dancing? Spoilers for the performances, ahoy!→[More:]

Lauren Gottlieb & Neil Haskell: Just because you have a twin brother and I dabble in twincest is not a reason for me to vote for you. It wasn't a very memorable performance for me.

Jaimie Goodwin & Hokuto "Hok" Konishi: She was forgettable, but I really want Hok to stick around and actually learn how to do ballroom stuff the right way, so I think I'm likely to vote for them. Hok did perform the heck out of what he was given, and he needs to be recognized for that.

Jessi Peralta & Pasha Kovalev: I want a Pasha for my very ownsies to dance with and take me dancing and there will be lots of dancing. I've got to get my boyfriend into dance somehow. And as much as I wanted to hate Jessi for the baby oil/suitcase thing, I can't help but love how fiercely committed she is to dance.

Sabra Johnson & Dominic Sandoval: Oh, so cute! He shaved his toes for dance! And I also got teary-eyed because he was so nervous about what Mia the Barbarian was going to say about his contemporary style. He showed heart tonight, and that's why I would vote for him. Sabra was wonderful, too... but he shaved his toes for dance!

Faina Savich & Cedric Gardner: I agree that they're going to be in the bottom three, unless a bloc decides they want to keep Cedric because they don't like what Mia said. I did think that it was very cute and I loved some of his lines, but then again I'm not a trained ballroom dancer like Mary Murphy (who does not irritate me when she gets technical).

Lacey Schwimmer & Kameron Bink: Lacey is a very savvy lady. She knows that people are gunning for her, and it seems like she's deliberately playing that down. In a way, I feel sorry for her because she does have a lot to prove because she's related to last year's winner, and she's got the talent to back it up. Kameron was cool, but once again, he was a prop for her to just shine off of. But then I also thought it was cute how he had to firmly establish that he was not gay.

Anya Garnis & Danny Tidwell: What is it with the tall guys and the waltzes, huh? They're killing me. Mia liked how his hands were doing a different thing than the rest of his body, but I thought they were all over the place and think that means we said the same thing. However, I don't care that his hands were all over the place because he did an excellent job of partnering her. Not just that reverse-attitude spin, but all of it. Especially those reverse rolls.

Shauna Noland & Jimmy Arguello: Mia said "dance school" but with the choice to do step moves with Shauna's blonde hair free to go all over the place, I'm going to say "college cheerleader." That's what that routine was to me, and I really didn't care for it. But ya know...? That's all the choreographer's fault. And Shauna's fault for having a stereotypical "blonde cheerleader" look.

Sara Von Gillern & Jesús Solorio: Ever since I first saw Strictly Ballroom, I've had a hard-on for the paso doble. I like to think I have an open mind and could get the routine to that music, but really...? Queen? "We Will Rock You"? No freakin' way. So I did what I had to do: I put scrambled for the Mute button, and it became absolutely lovely.

I think I know what I have to do. I'm going to vote 10 times tonight, with a majority of my votes going to Sara and Jesús because I think they're going to need it more.