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07 September 2006

I too need some advice, MetaChat. [More:]
Do not flash the octopus.
posted by occhiblu 07 September | 13:55
Always wear clean underwear because you never know when you're going to get hit by a bus.
posted by iconomy 07 September | 13:55
Don't leave your seed pods in the rental car.
posted by Specklet 07 September | 13:58
Never pet a dog that's on fire.
posted by BoringPostcards 07 September | 14:04
If there is any chance at all that the front door will lock itself while you are getting the paper, wear more than one item of clothing.
posted by sarah connor 07 September | 14:06
"Don't sleep in the subway, darling..."
posted by Zack_Replica 07 September | 14:15
My grandmother always used to say the same thing, iconomy. Then one day my uncle DID get hit by a car and the first thing he said to the EMTs was "I'm wearing clean underwear!"

True story.
posted by jrossi4r 07 September | 14:25
Heehee jrossi...that's hilarious...!
posted by iconomy 07 September | 14:27
Don't leave the house without your boots on, the revolution might come while you're out.
posted by omiewise 07 September | 14:47
Stay away from the dog track.
posted by bunnyfire 07 September | 15:10
one for the guys out there: "Never peel a carrot in the nude"
posted by eekacat 07 September | 15:15
when it comes down to making out, whenever possible, put on side one of led zeppelin IV
posted by birdherder 07 September | 15:25
I only have two:

1) Never get involved in a land war in Asia
and the lesser known:
2) Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line.

That's it.
posted by richat 07 September | 15:28
Don't shit where you eat.
posted by getoffmylawn 07 September | 15:31
Never mistake Self Improvement for Hypocrisy.
posted by seanyboy 07 September | 17:29
Don't chop chili peppers and then rub your eye
posted by moonshine 07 September | 17:38
Don't shit where you eat.


According to Mythbusters, it's fine to eat where you shit (bacteria count in the bathroom was no worse than anywhere else).
posted by pieisexactlythree 07 September | 17:41
It's true. It's actually pretty sagfe to eat your own poo, as long as you don't have hepatitis.

And if, you know, you don't mind being labeled a fuckin' freaky shit-eater.
posted by Specklet 07 September | 17:46
Glad we got that covered. It seems to have been an issue for a couple days now.
posted by mudpuppie 07 September | 17:49
It's actually pretty safe to eat your own poo...

So much for "eat shit and die."

Advice: If you wake up with a toe tag, let someone know.
posted by Pips 07 September | 18:02
Don't fight a land war in Asia. I've followed this advice, and it's served me well.
posted by jonmc 07 September | 18:33
Lean into it a little. Always tip. Get down from there you'll break your neck.
posted by Divine_Wino 07 September | 19:54
Don't leave crayons in the backseat on a hot day.
posted by casarkos 07 September | 21:21
The cops never think it is as funny as you do.
posted by LarryC 07 September | 22:45
If you have hepatitis you can prolly eat your own poo, like dude, you already HAVE hepatitis.
posted by eekacat 08 September | 00:54
I need some advice, MetaChat || "Craig Moore, 28, took his revenge on the camera,

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