User:Lipstick thespian
Lipstick Thespian was born in a chain bar in Portland on a crappy, windy evening. He didn't know what he was doing there, much less the people he was with, but then he was told what his name was, and it all changed.
From that point on, he became a titanic force in the world. People came from far and wide to hear him speak, or to see if he could put his pants on correctly. He would usher them in to his gypsy caravan tent to proffer them fresh socks and minty drinks. For this he was given several humanitarian awards by governing agencies.
Lipstick Thespian has since become a household word across the nation, and his visage adorns many a coffee mug and baseball cap. He's done Letterman, Conan, Oprah and the Smiling Happy Flaming Stick Show in Japan.
Feel free to dial Lipstick's 1-800 number to book him to come to your town. (Not available where prohibited.)
On IRC he has occasionally been mistaken for either a genetic female or a transsexual. Or lately, as Ayer Vook.
It is Lipstick Thespian's greatest wish to have his penis tattoed in the likeness of an elephant. Well, not his greatest wish - the greatest would be to have the money and the body and the guts to have a penis elephant tat properly showcased on his person.
- At the moment of his birth, the Thespian's father fainted dead away, but not before he shouted "This boy's name shall be Archibald Alexander Leach!". His father was fine once he came to by the way. The Thespian's mother was also fine, all things considered. Yup, they were alllll fine.
Lipstick Thespian was recently awarded honourary Canadanian citizenship. His triumphant return to collect his Kids in the Hall DVDs, lifetime supply of the letter 'u', case of maple syrup, Tim Horton's calendar and a tattoo will be greeted with a parade of slutty marxist cheerleaders. This will provide the distraction necessary to allow us to abscond with his passport and return ticket, ensuring his permanent resident status.
