MetaChat - Help, I'm trapped in a corporate all-hands meeting

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30 October 2014

Help, I'm trapped in a corporate all-hands meeting

post by: octothorpe at: 14:04 | 14 comments

Our site director has said every single bullshit corporate-speak cliché imaginable in the first five minutes and there are two more hours to go.

posted by octothorpe 30 October | 14:08

Utilize synergy!!

posted by JanetLand 30 October | 14:40

Building bridges and removing barriers to innovation.

posted by octothorpe 30 October | 14:41

Thinking outside the box, implementing our core values to deliver an optimum customer service experience, addressing the concerns of a dynamic market...

posted by Senyar 30 October | 15:00

Growing our company to better invertebrate the andalusian mission and penetrate deep into the holistic cross-section of the needful environment.

posted by JanetLand 30 October | 15:40

Our greatest strength is in our people.

Success is 80% hard work, 10% luck, and 20% good math skills.

posted by Kangaroo 30 October | 16:24

Belt and suspenders

All the bells and whistles

Working together, we can solve anything

posted by bearwife 30 October | 18:19

DO listen to Weird Al's new song "Mission Statement"!

posted by Melismata 30 October | 18:40

We watched the video for Weird Al's song before we went to the meeting.

posted by octothorpe 30 October | 20:21

Remember, even at an all-hands meeting you should not get all handsy as in grabbing Chuck the Marketing Manager's butt no matter how fine it may be.

posted by arse_hat 31 October | 01:57

Too bad it wasn't a jazz-hands meeting.

posted by Hugh Janus 31 October | 06:49

Our site director's slides are all Getty images with inspirational aphorisms under them.

posted by octothorpe 31 October | 09:14

Watch out! It's Doge Eat Doge!

posted by Eideteker 31 October | 15:09

Leveraging our thought leadership network to make an impactful difference

posted by initapplette 03 November | 13:42

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