Can't avoid saying* I'm disappointed it wasn't a kilt...

*and being the first of many tempted to say so

A proper tartan kilt would be many hundreds of dollars.

I am seriously considering it as a Major Birthday Present however.


I would totally wear that out.

It looks like someone you already hated insulted your charcuterie platter in front of your potential new boss.

They will be the next meat platter then.

Just don't season it with your tears--

I don't know why exactly, but your pictures always look like you might cry. Do you have shiny eyeballs? is it a counter-smize? Lighting? Some kind of anime jiggly eye illusion?
At least it's kind of a fierce holding back the tears thing, like you're staring into an oncoming sandstorm. Is that a filter?

Btw, you're the reason I keep trying to watch Captain America GODDAMN YOU
One day left and this battle is over one way or another.

I spend about half of the year with watery eyes cause of the eyebrows I take to ...prevent getting watery eyes, so that could be it.