I'm helping make an Entire New Country, wanna help me do that? You could be the minister of Localism and the Internets.

You could write a bestselling book about the new somethingorotherness. With drink recipes.

Oh, I like box's idea. A LOT.

We start a commune that grows organic vegetables and raises llamas for their fiber. Then we write a cook book (with drink recipes) and become gazillionaires, only to donate most of it to charity and investment back into the commune. Except there will be world travel in there, somewhere, too.

(Also you can come live in the RV, either on the roof because California is very temperate, or the driver's and passengers seats because we only use them to hold the dirty clothes hampers.)

You could join the circus! You'd be great with the tigers. Or the little dyed poodles.

You could get really grizzly looking and pimp yourself out to tv stations as "the face of the recession" and talk about how you used to be able to afford razors and soap.
Then you'll eventually rake in tons of cash and buy up all the foreclosed houses in Detroit and become the king there, but you'll have to hide all your wealth or else you'll get fired by CNN.

Awwww .. this post made me sad. I'm really sorry you're feeling hopeless and miserable. You are one of the quickest, kindest and funniest people I know online. Your posts always make me smile and are always worth reading. You should be Obama's chief speech writer. Of course you'd have to move to DC and wear suits and study a bunch of boring policy stuff and you wouldn't have much time for us here. Then you could run for president yourself, and most of us would probably vote for you and then you could rename the country the United States of LT.

Or, you could start an online advice column. I LOVE "Ask LT Anything". Then it would jump to television and you'll have your own talk show. Celebrities would ask you important questions and would hang on your answers. I don't watch television much but I'd watch "Ask LT Live!"

Yeah you totally need a talk back show where you dish out preposterous advice.

Start your own on YouTube and start walking the path of fame!

Let's see... how about travelling the world, giving advice to strangers?

Some mystical company pays you to go travel the world and meet people and talk to them and give them advice on their troubles and worries. And because this company is so magical and awesome, your advice is the PERFECT thing for all these people, so you're like the SUPER BESTEST AWESOME FAIRY OF ADVICE and everyone flocks to you and loves you and showers you with all sorts of goodies that you could ever possibly need.

:)

You are one of the quickest, kindest and funniest people I know online.

This is true in facespace, too. You deserve the best, my friend.

So: you and me, we start a traveling puppet show. With lifesized puppets. They give advice to the audience, they cook a meal (dinner theater!), and they wrap it up with a kickboxing show.

Miko and The Fella will shill for us, drawing in the crowd. Heck, The Fella can write us up in the paper, and Miko can book us into some of the highbrow museum venues.

We are going to make a fortune.

omifuckingodiloveyoupeoplesomuchrightnowithinkiwill

cry now.

*smooches LT*

Oh wait, you weren't looking for instant gratification?

I envision a wonderful career in advocacy and grassroots organizing for kick-ass political causes you are dedicated to! You just glow (in text form) when you talk about the volunteering you do, and I admire you whole-heartedly! Hang in: tough times pass. It took me a long time to figure that out, and it's my mantra. xxoo to you.

{{{{LT}}}}

I has a notion you will soon haz a happi! Good things are coming your way!

Big ol man hugs dude. I'm so sorry.

please don't buy houses in Detroit.

*hugs LT*

*whuffles LT prolongedly*