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I have to say I find this man and his family far more offensive than the Duggars
These past 12 or 13 years, our practice at Christmas has been to give each of our children one special gift-- ie rollerblades or something of that size and two smaller gifts-- totalling three gifts-- the same number gifts scripture records Baby Jesus received at his birth.
it wasn't always this way. years ago, i'd begin Christmas shopping in august and continue purchasing "cute stuff" or things "he'll love" almost up till Christmas Eve.
those Christmas mornings were disgusting. the kids would tear open one of the dozen boxes designated for them, look briefly at the new toy and grab for the next wrapped package, while tossing the latest gift into the heap along side them on the floor. until the last box was opened, they were grabbing for "what's next."
the Duggers just gave birth to their seventeenth child. i've read quotes and seen them on TV since the birth of their fourteenth child. the single most disturbing thing about the Duggers is this: at the very moment they are first holding in their arms an astonishing, unique, unrepeatable, eternal gift from God, they are already looking for the next one.
I have given birth to ten live children and lost two. when i am holding my newborn baby in my arms, i have absolutely no thought to who might come next. i want only one thing-- to spend the rest of my life learning who this person is, feeling completely humbled that God has given us this gift of this child.
when people learn we are parents of ten, have homescooled for seventeen years, are actively involved with our church (the general family bio that follows us like a billboard) they often ask, "didja see that family with 16 kids on TV? are you like them?"
no. we are not like them. my children have never been required to dress alike because they are unique people, not part of a set. when they approach their first birthday, we are not actively trying to refill their baby slot. we like them to be the baby for a long time.
they are not expected to all learn violin. my pantry does not look like the new, bright, clean A+P superstore. our home looks like real people live here. even for a TV interview, this place would appear to be as loved as it is.
i don't think the problem is some perceived overpopulation or that the Duggers have too many children.
instead i am sad that as the Dugger children emerge into the world, perfectly brand new from God, their parents can't seem to sit still long enough to deeply relish that particular gift of that particular unique child. instead they seem like my spoiled kids on Christmases of old, insisting, "what's next?"
from another thread. Amaris wrote (I hope you don't mind my repeating this.)
Mrs. Duggar keeps the newest baby as her "buddy" until he or she is 6 months old. Then the baby is weaned and handed off to an older child, and the child becomes the baby's "buddy", ie parent. They are responsible for feeding, clothing, cleaning, entertaining, comforting, and teaching the younger one.
The breakdown of chores also makes me uncomfortable - the lists have things like an older boy's chore being to walk the dog, which his younger sister gets to cook dinner for the entire family, and another daughter does all the laundry.
i didn't know this but i'm not surprised, really. i just don't get a strong sense that this family primarilly values the human dignity of each child. i wrote PRIMARILLY. it seems to be a secondary or even tertiary concern. it shouldn't be.
i had also forgotten to mention the seventeen J names. i think there is a lot wrong with this picture.
someone had written they are living debt free. they should be. he's a state senator and they're on TV a lot.
With out going into a lot of detail about why I think this, I am just going to say, that I agree with you....
One thing I will say, & this is no secret: The Duggars deliberately wean each baby as soon as possible, in order to make it more likely that they can get pregnant again sooner....despite the fact that it is far healthier for the babies to have breastmilk for a longer time.....
I guess I just feel sorry for those little babies. Brought into this world, so innocent, & handed off to siblings.....They need their mama, not another child, taking care of them....
So, how many is too many? Where should the Duggars have stopped?