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01 April 2008

I didn't get shortlisted into the KaosPilots. and that was supposed to be the easiest part.

I've asked them to reconsider, selling myself as a valuable asset (they're working with various Asian nations so having an Asian student would be handy, among other things) but the likelihood seems really really small.[More:]

I'm so crushed. I've spent nearly half a year on this. I looked at my bookshelf just now and there were very few books that wouldn't remind me of the damn school. I have tons of books on fundraising on hold at the libraries - and for what.

I feel terrible.
posted by gomichild 01 April | 05:13
aw poo - and honestly I'm really surprised considering you worked at it like I've never seen. Seems you'd be a great asset anywhere.

posted by dabitch 01 April | 06:42
you're a very talented person and it is their loss I am certain!
posted by By the Grace of God 01 April | 07:38
I'm sorry, divabat. That sucks to have hard work toward a goal feel like it was all for naught. Maybe after the rejection ouch wears off other doors will open that wouldn't have otherwise.
posted by chewatadistance 01 April | 07:40
I'm sorry to hear that, too. I agree with chewatadistance -- keep your eyes out for open doors and new opportunities, because this is when they're likely to arise.
posted by lleachie 01 April | 08:54
divabat, from what I've read about you in your posts here and on other forums on the web, you sound like someone who'd be good no matter which sort of an institution she'd get into.

I'm totally unaware of how beneficial kp might've been to you, but ten years ago I would've balked at the idea of going to the Government funded college that I go to now, even though as I've found out it's much better for me than all of those other Private Schools... not saying that you should give up on your dream, but hopefully you'll find something better in the meantime.
posted by hadjiboy 01 April | 09:47
(((divabat))) So sorry, honey!
posted by small_ruminant 01 April | 12:23
Thanks everyone. I just heard back saying they won't change any decisions. I don't know what it was that made the selection panel not like me enough...and I'll never know now.

One of their other schools in Rotterdam is also taking in applications in a couple of months, so there is that option. However, I'm not sure I want to take that risk all over again. It is cheaper, but still.

I'm not sure what to do. My passion and energy had been wrapped around this goal for a while, they were so tightly related anyway. Now it seems I can't do anything about my passion without being reminded of this lost option.

argh...I don't know. It's like breaking up and facing a death.
posted by divabat 01 April | 16:28
This is the last post on personal matters for a while. || OMG Penguins.