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07 March 2008

One of my secret guilty pleasures is [More:] ...catalogues.

I love 'em. I get a frisson of excitement when the new Argos book comes out, even though it now weighs about 10lbs and I always make the mistake when I see the 8ft cube of catalogues in the store to grab one at once in case they all run out and then I have to carry it around with me all through my shopping trip. Argos is the style bible for chavs throughout the UK. Its Elizabeth Duke jewellery is particularly stylish and classy.

And I love the Sky Mall catalogue - it truly is the highlight of my transatlantic flights. Where else can you find a set of dog stairs ("Sturdy yet lightweight pet stairs make it easy for pets to climb to couches, beds, and other furniture that is otherwise difficult for them to reach... ") being sold on the same page as a dog tazer ("Train your pets to stay off furniture ..")?

Then I get a few catalogues through the post, my favourite one being Lakeland. As a keen cook, I salivate over some of the gadgets on sale.

I recently received a Westfalia catalogue, a new company to me, but apparently an old-established German business. They have tools! And farm things (how did I ever manage without one of these?) The Westfalia catalogue, like the website, is written in a strange Germanic English which scares me. I daren't click on the link for "Boiling down apparatures"

But today I received the absolute zenith of mail-order catalogues - Temps L. I'd never heard of them, but they sell the kind of items that are too crappy even for As Seen On TV infomercials. Seriously. I'm not kidding (how Marge Simpson would love that mat!)

And, there can be no doubt about it, Temps L sells the most useless item ever made. But the most awesome. Scroll down the page to see the full awesomeness of it.
Where else can you find a set of dog stairs...being sold on the same page as a dog tazer?

This, frankly, sounds like hours of fun if your dog is sufficiently stupid.
posted by cortex 07 March | 16:12
I'm speechless over the thing in your last link, jan.

...
posted by BoringPostcards 07 March | 16:16
One of my secret guilty pleasures is Archie comics. Love them.

I'm not really secret or guilty about it, though.
posted by Miko 07 March | 16:17
BP, I'm going to mail you the Temps L catalogue because I know how much you love kitsch. And there's no shortage of it here.
posted by essexjan 07 March | 16:23
My new one is "Keeping Up Kardashian" on TV. One has to admit, they are close knit. Not functional, but close knit. Plus - Bruce Jenner.
posted by rainbaby 07 March | 16:24
I wonder if they could make a musical candle fridge magnet...?
posted by gaspode 07 March | 16:24
Does Westfalia also make camper tops for VW vans?
posted by box 07 March | 16:25
Ha! It's potentially lethal too!
posted by essexjan 07 March | 16:26
Holy fricking shit! Look at the video of it.
posted by essexjan 07 March | 16:30
I wonder if they could make a musical candle fridge magnet...?

They probably could, but it'd melt the fridge door off.
posted by essexjan 07 March | 16:34
OMG, ej, that video just made my WEEK. Fiery flowery birthday-music death! It's beautiful!

(And thanks for the catalog... this looks like prime stuff.)
posted by BoringPostcards 07 March | 16:50
e-jan: next time you're on this side of the pond, you need to see if you can track down a copy of this parody of Sky Mall. I scored one for my SO for Xmas this past year and scored major points (she's a big fan of the regular Sky Mall as well). It's awfully f'ing funny.
posted by ufez 07 March | 16:52
Oh wow, Sky Maul looks fab.
posted by essexjan 07 March | 16:57
Seconding the SkyMaul recommendation.

I love catalogs, too. Right now there's a beekeeping catalog sitting next to my toilet. The best are the Lillian Vernon-type of catalogs filled with awful tat for grannys.
posted by jtron 07 March | 17:56
I like the ones that sell things like this. I had a friend who had a horse jacket. She wouldn't believe me that it was an old lady jacket until we went to an outdoor market one day where everyone we saw wearing a kitten, wolf or dolphin print fleece jacket was over 70.
posted by essexjan 07 March | 18:16
Holy fricking shit! Look at the video of it.

essexjan found the WMDs. Saddam had boxes of these.
posted by desjardins 07 March | 18:20
Hahahha, I loved the Argos catalogs as a kid - would go over to London to visit my sister and just pore over all the stuff they had.
posted by divabat 07 March | 18:55
American Science and Surplus sends great catalogues. Actually, they're black and white drawings on newsprint, but the descriptions are very entertaining.
posted by small_ruminant 07 March | 19:02
Also, Midway is cool because I have this bizarre idea that someday I'll be into black powder rifles. I probably never will- I'm too lazy. But they're cool anyway.
posted by small_ruminant 07 March | 19:05
Wrong link. Here's the black powder page.
posted by small_ruminant 07 March | 19:06
Oh yeah, s_r, I love the ASS catalog.
posted by mudpuppie 07 March | 19:07
After looking at Sky Maul, The Boyfriend directed me here. The last one is my favorite.

Oh. And I totally want one of those candles. Do you think they'll still sell it to me, even though it's been recalled?
posted by brina 07 March | 21:06
Bill Bailey on Argos.
posted by chrismear 08 March | 15:26
One of rhapsodie's best photos || Really long, really awesome Tim Gunn interview

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