Hahaha, I love the way she describes it. Hell, I'd marry her for her writing style.

Crazy Crap.

Apt.

Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

Why is human poop so much more disgusting than animal poop? If I step in dog poop, it's a bummer, but I just clean it off my shoe and go about my day. If I were to step in human feces, I'm pretty sure it would ruin the rest of my week, and I'd probably have to throw my shoes in the garbage. Ugh!

Funny story, though.

Yeah, I'd also marry someone who can so eloquently describe a Poop Caper.

Atom Eyes -- I think it's principle. Humans should know better. Dogs, not so much.

I'm with Atom Eyes- I understand in my brain that poop is poop, but something about having to deal with human poop would gross me out in ways animal poop does not. Thankfully I have not yet encountered human poop in the city, but I imagine it's coming- just when I think the city has grossed me out to limit, something even grosser comes around.

Next time a drunk drops a growler on the landing in my building, I'll take a picture for y'all!

I think the real question here, eamondaly, is whether you *would* in fact be more likely to step in it. (Being male and all.) And also, did the 311 people ever show up?

Excellent piece!

That's some funny shit, there, I don't care who you are.

I just don't understand why he didn't poop in the alley for some privacy. Or on the side of the house. And if he didn't care about privacy, why not on the sidewalk? Or near one of the many trees? Or in the gutter?

A mystery, to be sure.

Poop caper.

Many moons ago at the lake where our family vacationed, someone was breaking into the swimming area dressing rooms at night and deliberately taking dumps on the floor. He (or she) became known as the Mad Crapper.

That was a good read.

/me bookmarks blog.

I have too many blogs now. :(

Also:
#111

Ahhh!! 111!!

(It's a number that pops up everyone and has done so since I was very little. Long story. Also it's where i get the 12 in my username. Both my sisters have screennames that end in 111, but I thought that was too long. 11+1=12. just so you know.)

everyone = everywhere, of course.

:;stops posting comments::

Don't you want to fix that semicolon there, Citrus? :)

Thankfully I have not yet encountered human poop in the city,

Are you sure?

That was so well written -- hilarious!

We've got so many homeless and transient people in our neighborhood that one learns to be very careful where one steps.

Speaking of which and re: Atom Eyes, I once stepped in an enormous pile of non-dog poop on my way home one night. It was far bigger than my foot. I just carefully lifted my foot out of the shoe and kept on walking (carefully and gingerly, I might add). I don't know how long my shoe-stuck-in-poop remained on the sidewalk -- I was afraid to go back and look.

During one particularly boring WesPac cruise, my brother's destroyer (his first ship) was plagued by the Mad Crapper, who would perform his rank offense anywhere -- even officers' "country" wasn't safe; one of the JO berthing areas got graced with the mystery miscreant's offering with a crudely lettered sign on scrap paper: "THE MAD CRAPPER HAS STRUGK AGAIN!!!"

Everybody was pretty suspicious of everybody else, to the point where Larry made sure of not being alone if he could help it, being a new "boot" fresh out of A school and wanting to stay out of trouble and under the radar. The CO and XO officially deigned not to notice, probably (correctly) figuring that going after the sailor(s) doing the deed would just make things worse.

The attacks sorta slowed down when it got to be time to conclude the cruise and return to Dago via Pearl; the "tiger" portion of the cruise was mercifully free of incident, which was good, as their were a few dependents embarked (one guy's dad, two officers' wives) for the Pearl-SD run. The Mad Crapper was never positively identified, but Larry figured it was one of the A-gangers who had the run of the ship, probably an electrician or IC.