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10 March 2006

What's Your Sitcom Tagline? If your life were a classic sitcom, what signature expression would you be associated with?[More:]You know, something on the order of "Aaaayyy," "Norm!," "Dyn-O-Mite!," "D'oh!" or Rev. Jim's wheezing groan.
'You have the right to remain silent...'
posted by jonmc 10 March | 10:13
"Please God, let this be a sitcom and not my life."

Oh wait, that's my tagline now...what was the question?
posted by omiewise 10 March | 10:24
"Well, that's another restraining order"
posted by Capn 10 March | 10:25
The kid has a habit of getting so excited by life in general that she falls over. (She's like a tiny Mary Katherine Gallagher.) Then she'll pop back up, give the thumbs up and declare joyfully, "I'm OK!" It would make a most excellent sitcom recurring bit/tagline.
posted by jrossi4r 10 March | 10:32
"I no longer wish to exist within this reality" - wait, that's what I say in real life.
posted by oh pollo! 10 March | 11:02
"While you were out, I got the keys to your car. And drove it into a big wall. And if you don't like it, tough. I've had my fun, and that's all that matters."
posted by Smart Dalek 10 March | 11:05
I'll take "Well, shoot a mile!"

Or maybe "Well, slap my grandma!"
posted by Miko 10 March | 11:15
An old one: "I'm just holdin' up my end of the conversation."
posted by JanetLand 10 March | 11:16
"Fuck all y'all!"
posted by gigawhat? 10 March | 11:59
You know what totally needs to be a sitcom? David Sedaris' stories about his brother Paul (The Rooster). He already has the best tagline ever.

"You can't kill the Rooster! You might can fuck him up a little bit, but you can't kill the Rooster."

Obviously, it would have to be on HBO.
posted by Miko 10 March | 12:06
"Fuck all y'all!"

Gigga, please!
posted by Capn 10 March | 12:07
My dick!
posted by Hugh Janus 10 March | 12:15
Good night nurse!
posted by moonbird 10 March | 12:22
"These hands! I can't get them off my wrists!"
posted by agropyron 10 March | 13:08
jrossi4r, you mean your real-life kid does that? Or "the kid" being "the proposed sitcom kid"?

If that's real life, it's almost impossibly funny.
posted by agropyron 10 March | 13:10
Miko--I agree. I would totally watch a show about the Rooster. While eating a big Fuck It Bucket full of candy.

It's my real life kid, agro. She just turned four and has these big nerdy glasses and just loves being alive so much she can't control her limbs.
posted by jrossi4r 10 March | 13:26
Wow, that's totally adorable.
posted by agropyron 10 March | 13:28
"Yeah, yeah. You just carry on arguing; I'm going to bed."
posted by Skrik 10 March | 13:55
"Yes, gum would be perfection."
posted by deadcowdan 10 March | 14:27
"It could have been worse!"

Which is also the tagline to my life.
posted by tommasz 10 March | 15:08
affirmative response: "Just a little."
negative response: "Not recently."
posted by tangerine 10 March | 16:05
Mine would be a call & response:

Me: Hand me a tool!

Other: What kind of tool?

Me: I don't care, I'm gonna use it as a hammer!
posted by Triode 10 March | 16:18
"You can stuff your sorrys in a sack, mister!"
posted by sisterhavana 10 March | 16:34
<muted trombone>wah wah waaaa<muted trombone>
posted by porpoise 10 March | 17:48
Please, help me choose between...

"Hello, anybody..."

"All seriousness aside..."

"That's easy for me to say!"

(Angry) "Once more and I'm gonna forcably remove your... (various endings include: spleen, uvula, shakra, moustache, inner child, implants, elbows...)

"I didn't survive (puberty, the 80s, my first marriage, my heart attack, a flesh-eating virus...) for THIS!"

"I'm only here to provide a bad example."

"I can't top that. Good night, anybody!"
posted by wendell 10 March | 20:24
Well, it's Friday, and I got new hair. So, I'm feelin' cocky. || If only there were a pithy catchphrase to use for amusing macromedia-flash