MetaChat - I am uniquely qualified by not having seen a single one of the movies nominated.

MetaChat is an informal place for MeFites to touch base and post, discuss and chatter about topics that may not belong on MetaFilter. Questions? Check the FAQ. Please note: This is important.

03 March 2006

I am uniquely qualified by not having seen a single one of the movies nominated. Ann Coulter's Oscar picks!

post by: pieisexactlythree at: 13:55 | 31 comments

Okay, now "Gunfight at the K-Y Corral" is funny.

/has also not seen any of the Best Picture nominees

posted by mike9322 03 March | 14:14

It's a rare year that I've seen any of the films nominated for any of the big Oscars. And yet, I still want to watch the awards.

posted by ThePinkSuperhero 03 March | 14:22

I am uniquely qualified to detest Ann Coulter by not having seen a single one of her shows.

posted by Miko 03 March | 14:26

Phillip Seymour Hoffman has vowed to bark his acceptance speech if he wins. I'm crossing my fingers.

posted by Hellbient 03 March | 14:29

I wish someone would shoot that bitch in the back of the head.

posted by puke & cry 03 March | 14:30

Let's try to not let this thread cascade into political virulence.

posted by matildaben 03 March | 14:34

No wonder she keeps getting fired. She isn't funny.

posted by quantumetric 03 March | 14:34

I don't know why anyone gives a toss about the political motivation of films. I mean surely the reason why Coulter objects is that the liberal elite are trying to brainwash normal right-thinking people. Well I don't know about you guys, but like most people I've seen more than a few films where the message was "it's not money that matters, but how rich you are in your heart" or "it's not how you look on the outside but what's inside that matters", etc.

When I look outside my window I'm left with the feeling that these messages against consumerism and shallowness have not been taken on board. Messages in movies don't work.

posted by dodgygeezer 03 March | 14:40

Messages in movies just make people feel smug for a few minutes, like they've done something good for the world by sitting on their ass in the dark for 2 hours.

posted by matildaben 03 March | 14:42

And talking of Brokeback Mountain:

≡ Click to see image ≡

posted by dodgygeezer 03 March | 14:45

George Clooney has been mau-mauing the awards committee by going around boasting that conservatives have called him a "traitor," although I believe the precise term was "airhead."

another Coulter lie. Clooney has been called a traitor and a terrorist

posted by matteo 03 March | 14:49

"Gunfight at the K-Y Corral" is funny.

mildly -- also, she makes it sound like only gays use K-Y. she is clearly uninformed

posted by matteo 03 March | 14:50

she likes it dry.

posted by puke & cry 03 March | 14:55

Ann Coulter is my favorite troll. She has even publicly stated on more than one occasion that she writes what she does specifically to make liberals crazy. She's very good at it. Knows all the buttons to push, and pushes with gusto. I use her for therapeutic purposes, like deep tissue massage or a purgative: whenever I find my outrage cresting, I read a bit of Coulter just to prove to myself that I can still tell the dragons from the gnats. If I can't read her without getting mad, then I know I'm too full of poison to be at my rational best, and hence in dire need of a break. YMMV

posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 03 March | 14:55

mildly -- also, she makes it sound like only gays use K-Y.

In retrospect and with a wider eye at the context, yes, not as funny. But my initial reaction was a chuckle. *shrug*

posted by mike9322 03 March | 14:56

K-Y dries out too quickly. Astroglide is much better.

posted by porpoise 03 March | 14:56

It's raining flo - that's why I posted this. ;)

posted by pieisexactlythree 03 March | 15:00

Also, for the record, I thought "The Magnificent, Fabulous Seven" was funny.

posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 03 March | 15:16

It's probably easier to wreck her asshole without the K-Y.

posted by Hugh Janus 03 March | 15:50

Oh - never ever use hair gel as an anal lubricant prior to anal intercourse.

It dries out, gets sticky, and ... er, completely wrecks the rectum. The penis doesn't fare much better, either.

/not personal experience; it was a story we managed to extract from an extraoridinarily embarassed friend

posted by porpoise 03 March | 16:12

nearly kiled 'im!

posted by pieisexactlythree 03 March | 16:15

porpoise: I'm sooo glad you added that note that it wasn't you.

Hair gel. Which is designed to dry in place and freeze your hair in a style.

I mean, come on.

posted by Miko 03 March | 16:56

Rectum? I barely even touchedum!

posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 03 March | 16:59

Still, it's probably better than using Icy Hot. (Not from experience, I'm just making that up.)

posted by matildaben 03 March | 17:01

Oh - never ever use hair gel as an anal lubricant prior to anal intercourse.
It dries out, gets sticky, and ... er, completely wrecks the rectum. The penis doesn't fare much better, either.

But it will leave your pubes in a beautiful quiff.

Uh-huh

* curls lip *

posted by dodgygeezer 03 March | 17:02

This is why I never use hair care products when I have my head up my ass.

posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 03 March | 17:03

she likes it dry.

It protects the centipedes and scorpions.

It's probably easier to wreck her asshole without the K-Y.

*laughs*

But it will leave your pubes in a beautiful quiff.

Uh-huh

* curls lip *

*laughing louder now*

This is why I never use hair care products when I have my head up my ass.

*laughing uncontrollably now, coffee gushing out of nose*

Thanks for the giggles. Damn.

posted by loquacious 03 March | 17:17

The "official" story was that it was dark and that the guy was really excited when the girl tells him that there's a bottle of lube in the nightstand. Guy grabs the first bottle he gropes from on top of the nightstand.

I'm not sure what the moral of the story is but it's got to be either a) don't let a dumbwit fuck you in the ass, or b) keep where you have sex organized and free of hairstyling products.

posted by porpoise 03 March | 18:15

c) Never take it "in the nightstand."

posted by It's Raining Florence Henderson 03 March | 18:17

"At the Movies with Mr. Tight Hole Operations" -- Jeff Gannon

posted by ericb 03 March | 18:52

It protects the centipedes and scorpions.

That is the single funniest thing I've read all day. No, wait. Ever.

posted by ColdChef 03 March | 19:49

← I made it to Austin... || Double Post? Tyson the Skateboarding Bulldog? →

HOME || REGISTER || LOGIN