MetaChat - Invention!

MetaChat is an informal place for MeFites to touch base and post, discuss and chatter about topics that may not belong on MetaFilter. Questions? Check the FAQ. Please note: This is important.

07 July 2005

Invention! I've been thinking about a device which has the external appearance, texture, odour etc. of a banana and yet the internal machinations providing functionality as a 'phone. A hybrid, if you will, of the two objects, their essences in complementary symbiosis. Suggestions?

post by: Pretty_Generic at: 17:03 | 43 comments

a MOOD house?

posted by Pretty_Generic 07 July | 17:06

GAY

posted by Pretty_Generic 07 July | 17:11

Banana phone.

posted by Specklet 07 July | 17:14

I did once have the idea for a mobile phone in the form of a pen. Instead of a keypad it would use handwriting recognition to dial numbers. I could have been rich I tell you....

posted by dodgygeezer 07 July | 17:16

PATRICK MOORE PLAYS THE XYLOPHONE

posted by loquacious 07 July | 17:18

Some kind of soft furry robotic racoon that:
- would wander round the garden eating slugs
- would have headlights for eyes for finding things in the dark
- you could summon and use as an instant seat.

posted by carter 07 July | 17:21

When I was in college I had a phone that looked exactly like a tall can of Budweiser! Ha ha! Wasn't I cool! Cutting edge decor, dude! The good thing about it was that the table was often covered with real cans of Budweiser and so when the phone rang people would invariably start picking up cans and putting them down. if you've drunk enough bud, watching someone answer a beer is freaking hilarious.

posted by mygothlaundry 07 July | 17:22

try opening five of these slightly out of phase

posted by Pretty_Generic 07 July | 17:23

It's a perfect day for bananaphone.

posted by kenko 07 July | 17:36

I don't know if I want to fight you or fuck you, P_G. Gah.

posted by loquacious 07 July | 17:40

ring ring ring ring ring ring ring

(i've got this feeling...)

posted by mudpuppie 07 July | 17:46

I`ve always found that one to be terribly addictive, Specklet. Also a gateway animation to harder stuff.

posted by dreamsign 07 July | 18:00

er. NSF some W.

posted by dreamsign 07 July | 18:00

Banana Phone is now my favorite song. It's ear candy times a thousand. I feel so dirty, yet happy.

I don't know if I want to fight you or fuck you

You know, you can do both. And if that song's playing you might be onto some new fetish genre.

posted by Slack-a-gogo 07 July | 18:27

Ping pong ping pong ping pong ping, panana phone...

My work computer blocked me from those links, naughty dreamsign.

posted by Specklet 07 July | 18:53

Do not click this. However bad you think this link might be, it is in fact worse. Please, seriously, do not watch this video, for your own health.

posted by Pretty_Generic 07 July | 19:03

It's a perfect day for bananaphone.

Excellent!

*waiting for someone else to click the no-no-click baddybad link*

posted by taz 07 July | 19:25

Fine. I'll take one for the team....

posted by mudpuppie 07 July | 19:28

And I will never be the same again, even after 2 seconds.

Really, don't do it.

And this is not reverse psychology talking. Seriously, don't do it, no matter how tempted. If you didn't trust P_G, trust me. Don't click it.

Here, look at this instead. Sure, you've seen it before, but trust me....

posted by mudpuppie 07 July | 19:31

(Also, there ought to be a NSFW-In-Any-Universe disclaimer on the link you are not to click.)

posted by mudpuppie 07 July | 19:35

I really like getting sloppy drunk and listening to old gospel records. Don't you?

posted by jonmc 07 July | 19:36

Korean's where it's at

posted by Pretty_Generic 07 July | 19:38

Wow. That's one cheerful song about eggs.

I can't play the no-no-clicky linky, but I'm wildly curious about it.

jonmc, you definitely have to be my boyfried now. I adore getting sloppy and listening to old gospel records!

posted by Specklet 07 July | 19:45

OK.

Break out the breadcrumbs and lard.

posted by jonmc 07 July | 19:46

Holy fucking shit. I really didn't want to be exposed to the inside of someone's pulsating, gaping anus, P_G. I'm quite aware of most of those activities, the suspensions, the needles, the sounding, but that shit is just incredibly... damn, out there. I would say obscene, but I don't really want to judge or pigeonhole anyone. Damn.

But the real, erm, icing on the cake is that guy with the fuckin' cactus. Sweet baby zombie Jesus in a plastic bag. I think I just broke something small and important in my little vanilla brain.

posted by loquacious 07 July | 20:11

I was merely pointing the URL out as one that you might want to avoid.

posted by Pretty_Generic 07 July | 20:13

What a coincidence, I have invented a "no hands" piano. It's a big hit at parties. (NSFW)

(I will love madamejujujive forever for finding that link.)

posted by LeeJay 07 July | 20:37

I can't wait till I get home so I can actually follow those links.

posted by matildaben 07 July | 20:38

I am not going to click on it here at work but, if memory serves, you should heed the warnings of Pretty-Generic and mudpuppie. Generally, you should assume that any link starting with http://www.blogdar.com is going to hurt.

posted by dg 07 July | 20:39

about that piano mpeg...I was young, I needed the money, OK?

posted by jonmc 07 July | 20:39

You're a talented organist.

posted by LeeJay 07 July | 20:45

Can someone at least describe the forbidden link?

posted by kenko 07 July | 20:54

*tries*

*fails*

Sorry, it's indescribable.

posted by dg 07 July | 20:58

There's some anus. And some singing. And some projectiles.

(And like I said, I only got 2 seconds in.)

Don't click it.

posted by mudpuppie 07 July | 21:04

Man, um, if you watch the Korean egg thing to the end, which I did for some reason, an egg grows a big nipple and jumps into an infant's mouth. I, uh, wow.

posted by ITheCosmos 07 July | 21:18

What, I didn't describe it? *Spoilers below*

It's a little more than 'some anus'. It's a Body Modification E-zine video. Basically a short montage of body self abuse/modification/etc.

There's a bit of blood, a lot of genitals, most with extra holes or extraneous chunks of metal already in them, being put in, or being removed. Plus some hand tools. And some rope and tackle, and hanging by delicate dangly bits from said rope and tackle. Oh, and there's some guy doing a 'lampray' on his wang with a soldering iron as a cauterizing tool.

The whole thing starts off with an anus that looks a bit like a sick Sarlacc Pit, or the mouth-parts of a very hungry starfish.

Granted, I've been to S&M clubs where this kind of stuff isn't that uncommon, but this was just about the most extreme I've seen.

posted by loquacious 07 July | 21:20

Granted, I've been to S&M clubs where this kind of stuff isn't that uncommon

That's between you and the preist in confession, OK, buddy?

posted by jonmc 07 July | 21:22

Sounds charming.

posted by kenko 07 July | 21:39

I prefer to confess to nuns, thanks.

I should probably re-iterate I'm outwardly quite vanilla. I have zero tattoos and currently zero peircings. My hair isn't blue, nor dreaded, nor shaved oddly. (It's the quiet ones you have to watch out for, or something...)

But I'll be damned if there isn't a better place (at least back then) to see/meet/discourse-with hawt, smart, sassy girls and/or women in corsets/leather/vinyl/velvet, hyperdance to real industrial or acid techno, discuss the latest antics of Genesis P. Orridge and maybe have a friendly spanking than at an S&M night at a nice, posh club.

Sin-o-matic and Kontrol Faktory, I miss you.

posted by loquacious 08 July | 03:41

What about the rubber ball?

posted by dabitch 08 July | 04:47

But I'll be damned if there isn't a better place (at least back then) to see/meet/discourse-with hawt, smart, sassy girls and/or women in corsets/leather/vinyl/velvet, hyperdance to real industrial or acid techno, discuss the latest antics of Genesis P. Orridge and maybe have a friendly spanking than at an S&M night at a nice, posh club.

That paragraph, my freind, is a perfect summation of why I would not be found there.

posted by jonmc 08 July | 12:12

You have something against seeing/meeting/discoursing with hawt, smart, sassy girls and/or women in corsets/leather/vinyl/velvet? Sounds fun to me.

posted by kenko 08 July | 12:43

Thanks for the warning and ..er.. recap, guys, especially mudpuppie for taking one for the team.

I don't want to be exposed to anus! /obligatory

posted by deborah 08 July | 14:51

← I wish I was wearing a sweater. || You decide! →

HOME || REGISTER || LOGIN